Family Educator, Nate Jensen, of Turning Point Family Services in North Platte, Nebraska, and indicates that children are harmed in the divorce process when parents:
1. Pretend a divorce will not affect their children;
2. Use the children as messengers to convey information to the other parent;
3. Put children into adult roles for their own support;
4. Demand that the children take sides;
5. Interrogate the children about the other spouse’s situation;
6. Withhold visitation out of spite.
Jensen recommends that parents going through divorce remember at all time that children need to know that what is happening is not their fault and that they should never be used as a weapon or included in adult arguments. Jensen offers these tips in helping children cope:
1. Let them know the divorce is not their fault.
2. Give them permission to love the other parent.
3. Invite children to express their feelings.
4. Give children time to grieve the loss.
5. Listen to your children’s concerns and feelings.